{"id":1737,"date":"2003-09-23T21:53:38","date_gmt":"2003-09-24T02:53:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/gazette\/2003\/09\/23\/you-can-call-me-the-drooler\/"},"modified":"2023-10-12T14:58:09","modified_gmt":"2023-10-12T19:58:09","slug":"you-can-call-me-the-drooler","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/2003\/09\/23\/you-can-call-me-the-drooler\/","title":{"rendered":"You can call me The Drooler"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Wlel, rlaseedrgs of waht the rrptoees form the eahdgges who do rceesrah at Cmiadgbre Uieestrnvy pprruot to raeevl, the oedrr of ltretes in wdors is iapnmrott to ciigtoonn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Saw a headline in this morning\u2019s sports section: \u201cReplacing Emmit Smith a lot harder than it seems.\u201d Overlooking the fact that it makes no sense, the main reaction I have to this statement is\u2026\u201dwell, duh.\u201d It\u2019s not exactly a revelation that a team can\u2019t pull up a suitable replacement for the leading rusher in the history of the NFL, and especially not a competence-challenged group like the Pokes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Another story documented the huge growth in the Bentonville, Arkansas area, as vendors hoping to suck up to Wal-Mart are relocating from all around the country. This phenomenon has resulted in an apparent overall upgrading of shopping opportunities via \u201cbetter-priced shops and restaurants.\u201d I suspect that Sam Walton would have a different interpretation of \u201cbetter-priced shops\u201d than the writer of this story.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Speaking of Arkansas, one of my favorite jokes originates therefrom. Seems a Texan was transferred to Arkansas, and the first week in his new home, he couldn\u2019t help noticing that his neighbor had a pig in his backyard, running free. Well, in Arkansas, this isn\u2019t all that unusual, but this particular pig was out-of-the-ordinary in that it was missing one of its hind legs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


The Texas was visiting with his neighbor over the backfence one day and asked about the pig. \u201cWell,\u201d the neighbor said, \u201cthat\u2019s not just any ordinary pig; that\u2019s a special pig. One day, one of our kids fell into the fishing pond and like to drowned. That pig ran down, pulled the kid out of the water, then came up here and grabbed my overhaul leg in his mouth and led me down there. Then, about a month later, our outhouse caught on fire with my mother-in-law inside, and that pig ran in and pulled her to safety. Yessir, that\u2019s one special pig, like one of the family, you might say.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n


The Texan was amazed, and said so. \u201cBut,\u201d he asked, \u201chow did your pig lose his leg\u2026in one of those rescues?\u201d \u201cWell, no,\u201d replied his neighbor. \u201cA pig like that\u2026well, you just don\u2019t eat him all at one time.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Oh, the post title? Courtesy of the Middle Earth Name Generator (Link no longer active). That\u2019s my full name in Orkish: Skaigob the Drooler. It\u2019s a killer name, doncha think? And it has the added advantage of working for both genders. My Dwarven name is also cool: Dori Silvernose.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Wlel, rlaseedrgs of waht the rrptoees form the eahdgges who do rceesrah at Cmiadgbre Uieestrnvy pprruot to raeevl, the oedrr of ltretes in wdors is iapnmrott to ciigtoonn. Saw a headline in this morning\u2019s sports section: \u201cReplacing Emmit Smith a lot harder than it seems.\u201d Overlooking the fact that it makes no sense, the main… Continue reading You can call me The Drooler<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[72],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1737","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-kitchen-sink","entry"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1737","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1737"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1737\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12753,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1737\/revisions\/12753"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1737"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1737"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1737"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}