{"id":354,"date":"2010-09-17T09:11:11","date_gmt":"2010-09-17T14:11:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/gazette\/2010\/09\/17\/100917_restaurantrant\/"},"modified":"2010-09-17T09:11:11","modified_gmt":"2010-09-17T14:11:11","slug":"100917_restaurantrant","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/2010\/09\/17\/100917_restaurantrant\/","title":{"rendered":"Restaurant Rant"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Have you noticed that some restaurants have become rather stingy with their oven time?<\/p>\n<p>First, it was IHOP, doing away with their iconic warm syrup, forcing us to us the decades-old, occasionally mislabeled communal dispensers. Now, as a kid, I was always amazed at the bounty of available sweet and sticky substances to be found in those containers &#8211; who doesn&#8217;t love dollar pancakes drowned in a combination of pecan and blueberry syrup? But that sort of thing lost its appeal roughly four decades ago, and now all I desire is a simple maple-like flavor delivered in a form that will actually melt the solid lump of butter atop the short stack. But, no, even that simple pleasure is now denied,*<\/p>\n<p>And then there&#8217;s Cracker Barrel, which has apparently adopted a strategy of combating global warming by serving its breakfast muffins cold.* (And without butter, although that&#8217;s a perverted blessing given the inability of the muffins to melt it.) Does anyone really prefer their blueberry or apple bran muffins unheated?<\/p>\n<p>C&#8217;mon, folks. Life&#8217;s short and hard enough without making us suffer these basic indignities. <\/p>\n<p><i>*In the interest of full disclosure, it should be noted that warm syrup and heated muffins will be provided, but only upon special request. But that&#8217;s sort of like ordering a bottle of wine with dinner and, oh, by the way, do mind also uncorking it for us?<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Have you noticed that some restaurants have become rather stingy with their oven time? First, it was IHOP, doing away with their iconic warm syrup, forcing us to us the decades-old, occasionally mislabeled communal dispensers. Now, as a kid, I was always amazed at the bounty of available sweet and sticky substances to be found&hellip; <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/2010\/09\/17\/100917_restaurantrant\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Restaurant Rant<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[30,8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-354","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-food-drink","category-just-plain-silly","entry"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/354","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=354"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/354\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=354"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=354"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ericsiegmund.com\/fireant\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=354"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}