Random Thursday

We prepared for the predicted cold snap (which arrived on schedule last night…temperatures are 30 degrees colder this morning than at this time yesterday, and snow is coming down in light flurries as I type this) by undertaking our annual ritual of installing flannel sheets on our bed. Flannel makes great sleeping in cold weather, although one must be careful not to overdo it. An ugly secret of the flannel bedding industry is that every year, scores of unwary people crawl between flannel sheets while wearing flannel pajamas, and aren’t found again until the spring switch back to cotton sheets, when their stiff — albeit cozy — bodies are discovered fixed in place, unfortunate victims of Flannel-Velcro Syndrome.

  • Bumper sticker sighting of the week: “Midwives help people out.” Heh.
  • Is there really a big market for midwife-related bumper stickery?
  • And speaking of being with child, I’m getting tired of hearing how Keisha Castle-Hughes’s out-of-wedlock pregnancy is an “intriguing parallel” to the story of the virgin Mary whom she portrays in the new movie about the birth of Jesus, The Nativity Story. I even heard one talking TV head observe that Castle-Hughes’s boyfriend is a carpenter, same as Joseph, Mary’s betrothed, as if that enhances the lovely mysticism around the whole situation. Maybe I’m overly sensitive, but attempting to equate this particular teen pregnancy with the miracle of the Virgin Birth is misguided at best, and insulting at worst.
  • In fact, I can think of at least one religious group which has burned entire neighborhoods over less.
  • Don’t you just love the signs of the season: houses drapped with lights, Christmas tree lots going in on every vacant lot, lawsuits over nativity scenes? One of my favorite signs is when the email spammers switch over to their festive holiday themes. Within the past few hours I’ve received emails touting various prescription drugs, with the subject lines of “Seven swans a-swimming” (Zoloft), “Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer” (Avandia), “Jack Frost nipping on your nose” (Coral Calcium), “Hang a shining star upon the highest bough” (Diflucan), and “And then we got upsot” (Cozaar). If that doesn’t get you in the Christmas mood, nothing will.
  • I know that “upsot” thing is from a carol, but I’m having trouble remembering which one. Is it “Jingle Bells”? Can someone confirm that?

OK, that should just about do it. Be sure to stop by and leave appropriate congratulations for Patti who completed her entry in this year’s National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). I’m thinking about entering, myself; there’s still 15 hours left in November. That’s less than 4,000 words per hour…

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14 comments

  1. I know that “upsot” thing is from a carol…
    “Here We Come A’Wassailing”?
    Re: bumper stickery. I may or may not have been the first to think of “web designers do it with style“. “Not”, probably.

  2. OK, that’s a better suggestion than mine — “Web designers do it with HTML, XHTML, Javascript, PERL, PHP, mySQL, Flash, CSS, Java, and every other dang thing to come down the pike” — which, while quite catchy (IMHO), requires a wider car than I can afford.
    You’re probably right about the wassailing, because it doesn’t take much of that stuff to upsot me.

  3. A year or two ago,
    I tho’t I’d take a ride
    And soon Miss Fanny Bright
    Was seated by my side.
    The horse was lean and lank,
    Misfortune was our lot.
    We got into a drifted bank whee!
    We got upsot!
    Oh, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,….
    You KNEW I’d know.

  8. Wow! I’ve never heard that Jingle Bells intro, or the word “upsot.” Thankful for spam quarantines, I have been spared most of the latest “signs” of Christmas, but funny how they are spreading the cheer. 😉
    I’ve never been a fan of flannel sheets for that reason (or satin sheets for the opposite, being unable to stay in bed). 😉

  9. Let me know when you find a set of sheets that are half flannel and half cotton? Cindy would take (er…i mean can have) the flannel half and the rest of the covers and i’ll stick with the cotton.

  10. Gwynne, we’re all about classical education here at the Gazette. And the tuition is quite reasonable!
    I don’t believe I’ve ever slept on satin sheets, by the way.
    Lyle, I think you’ve hit upon a great idea. Of course, your application would have the sheets divided lengthwise, but you could also divide them across the bed, for those whose feet get colder than the rest of their bodies. This could be worth millions! Don’t tell anyone…we need to develop the idea in secret. (And this blog is the best place to keep a secret that I know.)

  13. No one told me that if I got stuck to my sheets I’d get to hibernate for the winter. Sign me up. 😉
    Personally I don’t have that problem with flannel on flannel. Fleece pajamas on flannel sheets has proven to be a, uh, sticky situation for me though.

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