Fire Ant Flickers (#11)

Well, hello there! It’s been a few weeks since I posted anything here, and I either owe you an apology or you owe me thanks, depending on your perspective.

I have lots of excuses, only one of which might be considered worthwhile; more about that in a moment. But at this point, I want to welcome those of you who might be visiting the Gazette out of curiosity after reading a certain article in a local publication. I also want to disabuse you of any expectations of quality reporting herein; the interviewer did an excellent job of making me sound far more intelligent and eloquent than I am, and while I do appreciate Ms. De Los Santos’s kindness in that regard, it really puts a lot of pressure on me to deliver. I may have posted a photo of Hemingway’s typewriter, but my abilities are better illustrated thusly:

But, since you’re already here…let’s see what might emerge from the old keyboard. And, seriously, thanks for dropping by!

Radiation Vexation / Cessation

Here’s the excuse I alluded to above. I finished 39 sessions of radiation on April 25th, and suffered only very mild side effects. That quickly changed, and for the following six weeks or so (I marked June 9th on my calendar as Liberation Day), I was often miserable to the point of paralysis. That included a trip to the E.R. when the pain was bad enough that I thought I was suffering from a kidney stone (I wasn’t) in addition to the other aftereffects.

This situation was compounded by the fact that my radiation oncologist and my urinary oncologist were 50 miles away, but in opposite directions, and there was no local specialist I could consult with. In addition, the side effects of some of the prescribed medication were unpleasant, albeit not enough to stop taking it (except in the case of an antibiotic for which the primary warning was — get this — ruptured Achilles tendons).

But I’m happy to report that God’s grace was more than sufficient, Debbie’s caregiving was tender and soothing, and the radiation oncologist was exactly right when he advised me that when the aftereffects subsided, they would do so almost instantly. That’s exactly what happened, and I’m completely over all of those pains. It’s a now just a waiting game to find out if the radiation was successful.

Moving on to more pleasant topics…

Dapper Duck Do (sorry)

We recently spent a long weekend in San Antonio, staying in a hotel on the north end of the Riverwalk (aka the Museum Reach). Besides having fewer inebriated tourists, this section of the river has a variety of waterfowl:

I’m far from being a duck expert, so I don’t know what breed the one on the left represents, but I can tell you that based on my extensive research (a Google search for “duck with top knot”) the one on the right is a Crested duck. It first caught our attention when it was inexplicably attacked by one of the dark-colored fowl, I suspect as a result of envy of its stylish coif.

We won’t dwell further on this breed other than to note its cultural significance (we’re all about culture here at the Gazette) by pointing out that the Dutch painter Melchior d’Hondecoeter (1636-1695) often included a Crested duck in his work. Feel free to meditate on this tableau (ignore the dog striking fear into the avian inhabitants):

Vehicle Inspection Videos: A solution in search of a problem?

We took Debbie’s 10-year-old Lexus SUV to the dealership in Lakeway for its 70,000 mile service and I was quite surprised to get the following text from the service department:

Hi ERIC, view your RX 350 AWD’s inspection video here: https://link_deleted.
Thanks, ALAN
LEXUS OF LAKEWAY

Now, it’s been almost a year since we’ve had to get the car serviced, so maybe this is more common than I realize, but it was new to me. I initially couldn’t figure out why the dealership would even bother with something like this. But after watching the video, I could see the benefit, no pun intended. Here’s an edited version of the two-minute video. I deleted scenes that showed the license plate for privacy purposes, so have patience at the beginning. Also, the mechanic narrates the video so be sure to turn up the volume if you’re interested; plus, you can join me in wondering why a dog is barking in the background. Perhaps it’s sniffing for, um, contraband.

It’s pretty cool that they show the actual measurements that determine whether additional service is needed. I did end up letting them replace the battery; having done that myself in the past, I had no desire to undergo the tortuous process again. I will, however, defer replacing the tires until I can take the car to our local Discount Tire store, whose prices are much more reasonable (sorry, Lexus).

And while we’re on the topic of cars, can you guess what the following photo depicts?

If you guessed (or even better, actually knew) this is an exploded view of Volvo’s new seatbelt mechanism, you may advance to the head of the shop class. This new design, slated for rollout in 2026, is said to adapt itself to your body type, and can be updated via Over-The-Air (OTA) patches like those that Tesla often uses to correct the many issues its cars experience (sorry, Tesla). So, it’s a smart seatbelt with more moving parts than a dumb washing machine, and which operates in a culture where hackers are taking over our smart refrigerators in order to access our bank accounts. What could possibly go wrong?

At least we have finally found a use for the hashtag #overengineered.

*sigh*

Let’s talk more about birds…

Absurd Bird (again, sorry)

One of our local swimming pools is located at the base of some huge boulders, over which cascades a waterfall that circulates through the pool. On hot days, the edge of that waterfall is an attractive nuisance for the extensive local population of turkey vultures (aka buzzards) and black vultures.

We were at the pool a couple of weeks ago and I noticed a single bird — I think this one is a black vulture — perched on the precipice, and I took a photo with my phone. It wasn’t until I uploaded it to my computer today that I went into junior high boy mode (OK, I’m sure you’ve noticed that’s something I’m pretty adept at doing) and just had to post it here. If my meaning is lost on you, consider yourself more sophisticated than me, but also realize that’s not a particularly high bar to clear.

Parting Shots

I’m happy to be back at the keyboard. I can’t promise to be any more prolific than I’ve been recently, but I have a few ideas bouncing around in my head. If you want to know when the madness appears, feel free to subscribe (it IS free, and ad-free, as it’s always been and always will be) and you’ll get an email notice that will let you decide whether to come back or run and hide. Peace and grace to you.