OK, feast your eyes on this little jewel: That’s right – it’s an authentic Fire Ant Gazette wrist band, crafted by otherworldly artisans deep beneath the earth (in the general area of Wickett) from the finest silicon harvested by documented workers from the forests of Silicon Valley, and tinted in Classic Lead-Free Pewter to accentuate… Continue reading Ant Band
Category: Just Plain Silly
Cake Break(ing and Entering)
I think Dante left out at least one important level of Hell when he penned Inferno. Surely there’s a special punishment reserved for whoever invented those plastic cake containers that you get at the grocery store. You know what I’m talking about – those blasted snap-together covers that require an advanced degree in engineering to… Continue reading Cake Break(ing and Entering)
Rattlesnake Dreams
Debbie and I both dreamed about rattlesnakes last night. In my dream, one chased me as I was walking [home?] from [somewhere?] at [night?]. (I don’t always remember the details of my dreams with precise clarity.) Artist’s Rendering In a fit of terrified intrepidness, I jumped and grabbed a limb of a convenient live oak… Continue reading Rattlesnake Dreams
Spousal Challenge
Ladies, when it comes to manly things, don’t ever tell your husband that something he’s trying isn’t going to work. It’s like trying to teach a pig to dance. It never works, and it annoys the pig. For example, don’t ever say something like this: “I don’t think you can get forty bags of mulch… Continue reading Spousal Challenge
Light Duty
Q: How many people does it take to change the light bulbs in the ceiling fan in my office? A: Just one, but he should have a robust vocabulary to cope with the task of guiding a large fragile glass dome with one hand in such a way as to align and maneuver said dome… Continue reading Light Duty
I. Must. Have. One.
My command of the English language fails me miserably as I contemplate how to describe the depth of desire I have for this. It’s not real, you say? Then, I command you, make it so! Source via TwistedSifter
Black Rings of Distraction
I had a big ol’ Random Thursday post ready to go, but at the last second I decided you were probably tired of that meaningless, Content Free™ junk, so I pulled the trigger on a project that’s been rattling around in my head for a while, ever since I ran across this website. It’s called… Continue reading Black Rings of Distraction
The Vanishing Fire Ant
Update (4/6/11) I submitted a request for a refund via CafePress’s website and within 15 minutes was notified by email that they were granting it. They also said I could keep the shirts. Apparently they don’t want Fire Ant-less shirts either. Anyway, the interesting thing was this statement by the customer service rep: “I have… Continue reading The Vanishing Fire Ant
Zombie Movie Posters
The dismayingly prolific Neatorama website has an e-commerce arm called, appropriately enough, the Neatoshop, and I just discovered that it has an entire section devoted to classic movie posters that have been reworked with a zombie theme. While I’m pretty sure you-know-who wouldn’t consent to my hanging any of these on our walls (she can… Continue reading Zombie Movie Posters
More Suspicious Gaddafi Sightings
Despite the mental and psychological similarities, and disregarding the proven fact that they’re never seen together, I’ve come to the conclusion that Charlie Sheen and Muammar Gaddafi are not the same person after all. But…Bob Dylan? Well, you tell me.