Of Mice and Men*

So…which do you think is worse: finding an empty mousetrap, or one which has done what it was designed to do? It probably depends on whether you’re viewing the situation with or without a Y chromosome. I was glad to see that little mousy corpse splayed out under the sink this morning, while MLB was… Continue reading Of Mice and Men*

Napalming the Kitchen: Overreaction or Necessary Precaution?

One of the unavoidable steps in replacing windows in one’s house is the removal of the existing windows. This will inevitably result in the leaving in the side of one’s house what is technically referred to as “big freakin’ holes,” which may also be translated into verminese as “Grab the kids, Ethyl…the buffet is open!”… Continue reading Napalming the Kitchen: Overreaction or Necessary Precaution?

Will You Read The Gazette A Century From Now?

It’s a fair question, considering that Network Solutions is now offering 100-year domain name registrations. That’s right. For just $999.99, I can reserve fireantgazette.com* for a century, thereby ensuring that I can continue to blog to my heart’s content well after I’m dead. That carries some mind-boggling implications. Extrapolating from the first 18 months of… Continue reading Will You Read The Gazette A Century From Now?

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Abbye Update

I’m happy to report that Abbye is doing fine today, apart from being sore in the shoulder area. She was a little slow out of her crate this morning, but the recuperative powers of a scrambled egg and a little bacon (for medicinal purposes only, of course) are amazing, and she even consented to a… Continue reading Abbye Update

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Lightning Strikes Twice

My wife, Abbye and I were halfway around the park during this morning’s walk when the old man hobbled out from the cul-de-sac and onto the sidewalk ahead of us. He had a dog on a leash…a wiry medium-sized female of indeterminate breed, perhaps a terrier mix. We hung back, to let them move further… Continue reading Lightning Strikes Twice

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I toad you not to do that!

[Things are looking up, thanks to some herbal therapy. No, not that. I’m sipping a big mug of hot Kousmichoff Earl Grey Smoky tea (it comes in linen tea bags, you know…very civilized), and suddenly the world seems a lot more bloggable. The Kusmi Earl Grey is the best I’ve found. Most EGs have too… Continue reading I toad you not to do that!

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Easter Hill Country Tour – April, 2004

[Editor’s Note: The following post is the longest by far of any published on the Gazette. At 4,000 words, it violates the most basic tenet of blogging: keep it short and to the point. I apologize in advance for imposing this endless travelogue upon you. Perhaps the photos that accompany it will ease some of… Continue reading Easter Hill Country Tour – April, 2004